


Flirterers on Vacation

by Ginger Jam (skylite)



Series: Enchantments Ascend The Falls [6]
Category: Gravity Falls, Gravity Falls Dating Sim, Swooning Over Stans
Genre: Consensual Sex, F/M, Foreplay, Gen, Hetero Sex, oral sex - male, oral sex-female, penetrative hetero sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-16
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-07-13 07:26:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16013132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skylite/pseuds/Ginger%20Jam
Summary: Khrys promised Stanley a Hero's Welcome after he assisted Ford in rescuing Dajan from a magical mishap/misunderstanding.  She takes him to a part-faerie town disguised as a theme resort.This story takes place right after the events of Possibly Traumatic Stressful Dating and Questin' Mark and immediately before the events of Operation Silent Night.  The entire timeline was inspired by playing Swooniing Over Stans, the Gravity Falls Dating Sim, with art by one of the Lost Legends Artists and several other talented authors and writers!





	1. All That Glitters

**Author's Note:**

> CONTENT WARNING:  
> * Khrys and Stanley both swear.  
> * Described and explicit heterosexual sex though mainly early in the story and implied elsewhere.  
> * Graphic violence  
> * Animals harmed in defense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan gets to visit a fae/human run resort set up to look to humans like a theme park. Occurs immediately after the events of Questin' Mark and before the events of Elbow Room.

Stan Pines generally didn't hold to all the weirdness that seemed to be as common as the weather in Gravity Falls. Yet here he was, steeped in it again, up to his neck. 

f

 

His brother had managed to crash a tourist driver into the house at the beginning of the summer. The girl, Dajan, had been a panicked mess. The brothers had quickly offered to repair the car and put her up until that was done. Stanley hadn't expected her to say yes to two strange old men in the middle of the woods. But she had, Mabel’s enthusiasm paving the way. 

 

One thing had led to another, and his brother and the kid had grown close. Stan couldn't blame him; she was cute as a button and seemed to find him fascinating. If she'd been a bit more of a gearhead, he might’ve made a pass at her himself. 

 

Ford had managed to screw it up; if Stan were being fair, he had to admit his brother’s paranoia was not entirely unfounded.  His past was full of weird things that might come back to bite him. Danger could show up and take a swipe at Ford or anyone near him. 

 

The girl had turned out to be just about perfect under the circumstances. She'd stepped up, more than proved herself, and at a high cost. It had taken Ford, plus some friendly magic help, to solve the problem Dajan’s well-intended gesture had caused. 

 

Only one night before, he'd have thought all was lost and his brother broken beyond repair. But more magic and weirdness saved the day. The kid was recovering, and Ford, completely smitten, was not leaving her side. 

 

Now, though, Stan was following eagerly behind a young woman less than half his age… Correction, less than half his actual age. He was physically thirty again, thanks once again to magic and weirdness. 

 

The young woman was named Khrys, and called herself the elder cousin of Ford’s new paramour. Dajan was kinda low wattage weird. Khrys radiated it like sunlight. Dajan said she was around half human, give or take. If there was any human in her, Khrys was not telling how much. Stanley suspected she was less human than Dajan by the way people reacted around her, including Stanley himself. 

 

He wasn't even what Ford described as sensitive, but he could feel her like a tingle under his skin, even when he wasn't touching her. He knew, in the logical part of his brain that eschewed weirdness that this was unnatural and potentially dangerous. The romantic part of his brain he normally kept under wraps cared less about the magical danger she posed and more about whether he could resist falling for her. 

 

Khrys seemed aware of his roiling thoughts, or was just that perceptive. “Stanley. Listen. I'm not gonna make you do anything you don't want to. You undertook  a genuine quest for my baby cousin. This is a thank you, not a trap.”

 

“You find yourself uncomfortable, say stop. I'll take you home on the spot. That work for you?”

 

Stanley considered her words. His entire life in the pursuit of money had led him to crime and con artistry.. He knew scores of clever, sneaky and underhanded ways of phrasing a trap like an innocuous agreement. He knew already Khrys was a gorgeous, hard-to-ignore or resist distraction. To pretty much everyone except Dajan. He was silent in thought until she pointedly cleared her throat. 

 

“All right, kid,” Stan growled. It was hard to concentrate when looking directly at her.  “Long as I get to call it off anytime. Let's go to Never Never land or wherever.” 

 

Khrys laughed and it was like -- Stan had to shake his head to not start counting off poetic mush in his head like some stricken sot of a seventeen year old.  He hoped there was a point at which he'd get used to it. It was a lot of work focusing past whatever she was giving off. 

 

“Not Never land. More like a really good, Hollywood style facsimile. Didn't Daj tell you we can't get into the real Arcadia?” She took his hand, and made a balletic leap into the mushroom ring she'd led him to, yanking him along after. 

 

There was a sparkle of light, like aluminum foil being bounced through shaken seltzer and glitter. When Stan’s vision cleared, it was as if he'd walked into an excellent production of Camelot. 

 

“This is Pyritevale,” she said, smirking. “Home away from home. Come on, I'll show you around.” It looked like a renfaire village, only less fake. Stan couldn't decide if he was impressed or disappointed, given it was so medieval he wasn't sure he could swipe anything he could sell or put in the shack.

 

Khrys twirled past a tree. When she came out the other side, her human glamour was gone, leaving her in her preferred form. “Hot Elf” as Mabel called it.   _ Swell _ , Stan thought.   Khrys was captivating enough in her mostly-human guise.  Her true form was like turning that up to 11.  _ Women. Bad enough when they’re human.  Supernaturally hot ones are even worse.  It’s a good thing she’s a superior snob so I have a reason to find her annoying. _

 

“We’re gonna get the run of the whole town. The best suite in the inn.  All the shops. You’re a celebrity. Admired and not notorious.” She snapped her fingers, and in a shimmer, Stan’s suit became lightweight summer pants and a Hawaiian shirt. 

 

“Okay. I’ll admit that does sound like a nice change o’ pace,” Stan felt the goofy smile starting again but held it back to just the sort of smile he gave when Mabel did something nice for him. “You do this for alla yer cousin’s friends?” 

 

Khrys threw an arm around Stan’s shoulders, and shook her head.  “No. Only for above and beyond. Which you and your brother went. People do that in song and story, but not for people like us.” She looked solemn for all of a second before putting that megawatt smile back on. She stopped before a sign of quail in flight. “This is our best restaurant. Order what you want, as much as you want.” 

 

The room was enormous with a huge fireplace taking up its entire back wall.  There was a pig turning on a spit. A sizeable leg of mutton. And the air filled with savory aromas. Stan’s eyes got wide. “Okay. Now yer talkin’.” 

 

Dinner was like a montage from an old film. Stan sat and ordered whatever he wanted, and they. Just. Kept. Bringing. It!  Memories of being young, hungry and barely being able to panhandle enough for a sandwich off a fast food dollar menu were smothered in Stan completely gorging himself. Even memories of the hungry days shortly after his arrival in Gravity Falls were sent to his backbrain and washed down with the most potent and excellent beer he'd ever had the pleasure to taste.  Legends warned that eating faerie food might leave him starving and unable to enjoy anything else. ...but Stan thought it might just be worth it. 

 

Khrys, for her part nibbled. One bite for every five of Stan’s, and she simply sat draped artfully over the chair and answered any of Stan’s questions.  “It's not the food you were raised to worry about. Too many of us are too human to pull that trick off… or don't wanna spend the magic on one dude. Plus, if we hold you against your will? We have to keep spending magic on you. If we treat you right, and let you come and go as you like, you're not likely to out us because you'd lose your good thing if science came and carted us off to labs.  Besides. This is our tourist trap. We want people to go home and tell friends to come.”

 

“Pretty cynical,” Stan admitted, as a lemon souffle was placed before him. “Trust me, I know cynical.  And you're right. Too good to share. Your secret is safe with me.” 

 

“Good to know,” Khrys gave him a slow nod. “Glad to hear I've not judged you wrong.” She gave him another of those kilowatt smiles that made something in his chest go softer. “So. How you figure on burning off those calories?” 

 

Stan stopped with a spoonful of soufflé halfway to his mouth. “You propositioning me, kid?” 

 

“If you think you're up to it, old duffer.” 

 

Stan waggled his brows. “Oh, yer on, girlie. Just ‘cause there's snow on the roof don't mean there's no fire in the fireplace.”  He permitted himself a mild grimace. The hair wasn't grey anymore. 

 

“Good. Let's see what you got.”  Khrys rose from the table, scooping up a dollop of soufflé with her fingers and sucking it off them. She then sauntered her way to the elevator, heads turning to follow her all the way. Stan followed at a brisk clip, secretly savoring the envious looks he was getting. 


	2. Going Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Khrys and Stan decide to become friends with benefits as they check out how his body handles the exertion. 
> 
> Read Possibly Traumatic Stressful Dating and Quesstin' Mark first or you may spoill yourself for those stories chronologically.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the most explicit of the chapters. It gets violent near the end but this is the raunchiest risque bit.

The moment the elevator doors were closed, Khrys pounced like a cat. “I didn't know you were so cute when you were young,” she breathed into his ear before biting, gently at first, but with increasing fervor. 

Stan didn't bother with a reply. She'd got his motor running and already his breath was getting fast and heavy. He lowered his mouth to her neck, nibbled once, then applied himself to sucking at the skin there. He was rewarded with a throaty purr-moan from Khrys. Her hands moved from his shoulders to the center of his chest. She reared back long enough to hit the elevator STOP button, then leaned in and tore his shirt open. Buttons flew and ricocheted off the walls before clattering to the floor. 

Stan took a moment to gaze down in astonishment at her before gasping as her lips found his left nipple. He was the one who couldn't help moaning. He took a step back, one hand behind him to find the wall. Once he had the wall at his back, Stan brought that left hand forward and cupped Khrys’ athletic ass with it, squeezing hard. Khrys had moved her mouth across to the other nipple, undaunted by Stanley’s lush chest hair. She reached back with her right hand, even as her left traveled downward to Stan’s belt buckle. Once she pulled Stan’s hand off her, she put both hands to the task of opening his trousers, where an eager bulge was already waiting. 

Khrys’ luminous green eyes showed through her hair briefly before she reached into his boxers and pulled his cock free. She sank effortlessly to her knees. Stan couldn't stifle the moan as her cool lips closed around the tip, leaving a red lipstick circle around it. “Okay, let’s see how long you can take it,” came a muffled murmur from Khrys before her mouth closed around him again. She started slowly, finding a rhythm. Stanley's hands tangled in her hair, pulling her head down along his length. She chuckled, deep in her throat, setting up a vibration along his shaft that left him gasping. Her hands circled back to cup his ass, and pull him to her in rhythm as he pulled her toward him. 

She took one long stroke, bringing a hand up front again to cup his balls, then one long stroke back. When she resumed this time, he could feel the head of his cock hit the tightness that indicated the back of her throat. More intensely, he could feel the tiniest scrape of her teeth on his skin. The loudest moan yet escaped Stan, and what little concern he had left someone would hear evaporated as the sound tore out of his throat on a long, hot breath. 

Khrys alternated between using her lips, to employing her tongue, then her teeth,all while bobbing her head quicker and quicker until Stan was left bucking his hips helplessly against her with his eyes closed. He tapped frantically on one of Khrys’ shoulders as he could feel his resistance reaching his limit. 

Khrys continued, relishing her partner’s ragged gasps, feeling him spasm on her tongue before finally rearing back. Stanley’s entire body shook as he lost his grip and a white stream flowed forth to splash across Khrys’ cleavage. 

Khrys smiled up at Stan and pulled a key from her hair. She inserted it into a keyhole on the panel then released the stop button. The elevator resumed its climb. 

“Nice pearl necklace,” Stan rasped, hair limp with sweat and stuck to his face. Khrys just gave another throaty chuckle and lowered her mouth onto his shaft again. “D-damn…!”

Khrys amd Stan’s room was all the way at the top of of the inn, and she continued to suck Stanley off for ten more floors. She was merciless, bringing him to the edge, then slowing enough to let him begin to catch his breath before tightening her mouth around him and setting up another mind-erasing rhythm. He had to use the rail to remain standing by the time the door was open, and he staggered out, barely holding his pants up with one hand. 

“So, what do you say… now that the warm-up is done, “Khrys rose smoothly licking her lips, “ready for the next round?” 

Stan’s smile was quavery but his eyes were like embers. “Been awhile, but hell, yeah. Let’s start with returnin’ the favor.” He reached for the jizz spotted bodice of her dress and pulled her toward him, reaching up under her dress with his other hand. To his surprise and delight, she had no panties on underneath. His fingers found her lips, wet and inviting, but he let them travel up to her clit, thumbing it gently. 

“Oooh,” Khrys managed, then raised one leg over Stanley’s hip. The other followed and she crossed her ankles. Stan grinned at her, glanced over one shoulder to spot her bed, then lowered his mouth to her neck again, quickening the motion of his fingers above her lips. With each step, he lowered them until he could get his fingers inside her. “Yeah…” she moaned as he began sliding them slowly into her. 

The backs of Stanley's knees hit the bed and Khrys unlocked her ankles as he fell onto his back. Khrys sat up on her knees and went to position herself but Stan reached up and tore the dress open. As he'd suspected, there was no bra underneath. He pulled her to crush her breasts against his chest, then laid back and grabbed her by the hips to pull her over his mouth.

That five O’clock shadow rasped against her inner thighs as Stan licked and nipped hungrily. His mouth worked its way closer to her, tiny licks making her shudder and whimper above him. He then lowered her onto his tongue, thrusting it into her and going harder every time he felt her thrust her hips against him. After he had established a rhythm, he moved his hands up to her breasts. He rubbed in slow circles until her nipples stood up, then pinched them, hard, until she cried out. She leaned into his touch and arched her back, driving her nether lips against his vigorously working mouth. 

“Now,” Khrys whispered in a voice that would brook no argument. 

“Whatever you say.” Stan’s voice was more growl than mere words. His desire remained clear in his eyes and the firm, ready length of his cock. He reached one muscular arm around Khrys and flipped her onto her back. He meant to tease her with just his head, but they had both gotten too worked up. She was so wet he barely had to move his hips at all before he'd slid his length as deep as he thought he could go. But Khrys surprised him by raising her knees to her chest, then draping each over Stanley's shoulders. He felt himself drawn deeper and growled, “Yyyeeeeaaahhhh…” He began thrusting his hips against her, hard. 

“C’mon,” Khrys leaned up and breathed into Stan’s ear. “Don't hold back.”. She bit his earlobe, hard. 

Stan gasped, face twisting in that impossible mingle of pleasure and pain. Muscle memory was good for more than walking and running, and he put his back into it, making the headboard crash against the wall. Khrys got her arms around him and dragged her nails down his back, making him thrust harder still. He drew back until almost parting from her before pressing himself back down into her with all his strength. Khrys crossed her ankles around his neck, and pulled herself against him. Stan bit her breasts when she pulled back. 

Stan grabbed the headboard with one hand, then sat back on his heels with Khrys still astride him with her toes pointed toward the ceiling. Khrys pulled Stan's mouth to hers for a deep kiss, which rose to a moan, then a scream as she climaxed. To Stanley’s amazement, she was acrobatic enough to get her legs down without disengaging, and continued to ride his hips until she. He managed to work his right thumb down onto her clit again, and rubbed rapidly until Khrys’ orgasm seemed to stretch out into forever. His own climax came somewhere in there, leaving them both with heads thrown back, practically howling to the ceiling.

“Twice in one night,” Stan gasped, as they rolled to lie on their sides with him still inside her. 

“It only just got dark,” Khrys gestured to the last vestige of sunlight. “The night is young. And that was just round one. Better get some ice when you think you can stand again.”

Stan started to say “Whatever you say, Princess,” but the last three words trailed off as mumbling. He'd fallen asleep. 

“Okay, Stan. Rest up. You're gonna need it. ” Khrys smiled sideways, kissed Stan on the forehead, and went to grab a shower.

She was back when he woke shortly after. By mutual agreement they went for another quickie, but they both were so turned on it turned into another full session of ever more adventurous positions: Stanley entering Khrys from behind and slamming into her as she clung to the headboard on her knees. They went for it sideways, with Khrys holding a full side-split with her hands against the wall while Stanley tugged her into him by the hips. Once Khrys even magically reinforced the chandelier over the bed, and hung by her hands, straddling his head while Stanley stroked himself and ate her out until she screamed. They finally finished in the shower, all the spigots running steamy hot, while they 69ed in the puddling water on the tile floor.

Stanley dropped off to sleep again sometime near 3 am, and Khrys allowed herself to drop off in his arms. When he awoke in the morning, she was gone without a trace. A note on the pillow said she'd gone for a run and would meet him for breakfast at nine.


	3. Horesplay and Swordplay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan learns that there are things he can do for fun and that reading is one of them!

A glance at the clock told him he had an hour to be downstairs, so he took a leisurely shower, savoring the hot water and the multiple settings on the showerheads. He was used to the aches and pains of his formerly old body; so it was a happy surprise that his recently youthful body had none for the water to work on. He emerged, steamy, clean, and whistling, fresh memories of the previous night’s antics in his head. With a little sway of his hips, Stan crossed the room and checked the valet for an outfit. Khrys hadn't given him a chance to pack; and he couldn't imagine waiting around in just his towel for her to magic him up another outfit. 

His instincts were right. Khrys had stocked the cabinet with a variety of clothing in his size. The note inside the door said to pick what he liked and Khrys would settle up for him when he decided what to keep. 

“Dunno how comfortable I am with alla this,” Stan thought aloud. “On the other hand…can't walk around bare-ass naked until I go home either.” He chose a polo the color of his fez, a pair of black jeans and a pair of red Chuck Taylors. He admired himself in the mirror, then, satisfied with his look, hit the elevator back down to the restaurant. 

Khrys was waiting at the same table when he walked out of the elevator. She waved him over. Stan made his way through the crowd, only to jump a foot. “Whoa! Hey!” Somebody had taken liberties and smacked him on his ass. When he glanced around, several of the waitstaffers dressed as serving wenches looked away, but one woman winked before vanishing into the kitchen. Stan blinked and looked mildly stunned, but pleasantly so. It had been decades since a woman had paid him that kind of attention.

“See what happens when your clothes fit,” Khrys grinned at him over her teacup. It was shaped like a lotus flower and full of something sweetly fragrant. “Sorry, should have warned you, the naughty behavior is kind of part of the ambience here. We’re not exactly on American soil. Rules are a little looser. No such laws here.”

Stan considered those words with one quirked brow. “Tell ya the truth, I'm kinda flattered. Nobody's admired me like that in longer than I wanna think about. I know it woulda been a problem back home. This place is growin’ on me.”

Khrys laughed and waited for Stan to settle in. They placed their orders and chatted amicably until the food arrived.

“What's the deal with this resort, kid? I mean I appreciate the big shot treatment, more than you know… I may be a liar and a cheat, but you and the other kid have done right by me and mine. I can't let you foot the bill for alla this.”

“If the bill was an issue, I would not have offered. I've a stake in the resort itself and hella time saved up. Trips here for a weekend make awesome gifts.” Khrys shrugged. “I can take you home if you want, but I can pay for it and then some. Don't sweat it. Humans usually aren't good to us. When we find ones who are? That's like finding treasure, Stanley. Pretty simple: Give good, get good.”

“Yer not gonna get me all tender hearted,” Stan pointed a finger at Khrys. But it sounds like your folks and mine got some stuff in common. Only just started getting past it. It's still kinda a sore spot. Kicked out at 17, with barely a high school education under my belt and little more than the clothes on my back.”

Khrys winced. “Yeah. Sounds familiar. You know these?”. She tapped the ram horns above her temples. “They came in when I was six. Luckily the servants saw it coming and stashed a bunch of the not-Parentals’ silver and jewels for me in a separate bank until I turned eighteen. I'm lucky they never noticed and I got adopted shortly after the doorstop thing.”

“So you and Daj aren't cousins by blood.” 

“The whole family is like yours. Some blood, all love. You know how it goes. Mess with one of us… ”

“Mess with all of us.” Stan grinned wolfishly. “That was me and my brother. And now, I guess it includes you two and the big guy.”

Khrys put down her teacup and stared icily at Stan. He met her gaze, though whatever magic she had urged him to drop his eyes first. “Ya know I've seen dirty looks tougher than that in the mirror.”

“Look, Khrys, when you've lost your only family and are too stubborn or clueless to try and fix it when you could try to make it right? You learn that when life offers ya another shot and new family to boot? You don't make the same mistake twice. So I'm not playin’ with you. Pretty sure Dajan and Ford are the real thing, if Poindexter manages not to screw it up a second time. So it woulda happened anyway, right?”

“Fair point,” Khrys allowed, daintily tucking away a slice of bacon. “Just really difficult to let my guard down.”

“Believe me, I know the feeling.” Stan hunched his shoulders uncomfortably. “Still got a few reasons to keep my guard up even.” 

“Not here. We're ‘exclusive’. Nobody can find this place unless invited and accompanied by one of us. Our official address is in the Ozarks, since they need the jobs and money.” Khrys patted Stan’s shoulder. “There is no place safer. But we can hedge your bets. C’mon.” She yanked him by his elbow.

“Sheez, are all the girls in your family strong like this?” Stan semi-playfully rubbed his shoulder.

“Dajan gets it naturally. I work out. So...you know how to ride a horse?”

Stan roared with laughter. “I'm from Jersey, honey. Down the shore. Closest thing to a horse was a beach floater.” 

“Time you learned then. Useful for building up muscle. Deep tissue massage after. Humor your hostess. See how the other side lives.” 

It was a short walk to the stables, during which Stan had time to consider her idea. There was no telling how horseback riding might come in handy, even if he did tend toward making an honest living --more or less-- these days. And he was eager to get his body back into shape, now that he was younger.

The class about the basics of equine safety was a snoozer; Stan had a difficult time keeping his eyes open until the beautiful golden palomino was brought out for him to ride. “This is Bourbon Brown Sugar.” The horse took one look at Stanley, whickered softly, and began affectionately nuzzling his ear. Stan found himself chuckling like he was ten at the horse’s reaction to him. He had no fear at all as a result and reached up to stroke her nose gently. The horse made a sound not unlike a sigh and leaned into his touch.

“Well, nice ta meet you too, Sugar.” Khrys handed Stan an apple in a shade of red that looked like the metal flake on his car. Bourbon reached down for the apple. “Looks like I made a new friend.”

“Good thing. Sugar can be gentle as a colt, or wild as a maverick.” Khrys had taken the reins of another horse clearly related to Bourbon. “This is her little sister Mojito. The only one who can keep up with her.”

Stan had paid enough attention that he was able to saddle up and not fall off. He followed the example from the beginning class and gently nudged the reins, clicking his tongue. “Let's ride, Sugar.” The horse, sensing perhaps that her rider was new, took off at a mild trot. Khrys followed and paced them on the trail.

The morning passed pleasantly, between the horses gently strolling and cantering across the occasional straightaway. They came back to the stable and walked back to the main stretch for lunch at one of the little booths. Khrys got fried vegetables with bread and cheese, but Stan helped himself to an enormous turkey leg plus the same sides. 

“So?” Khrys asked as they found a shady table. “It wasn't exactly Gunsmoke or whatever, but you didn't die of boredom.”

“It was fun, kid. I might have to keep the skill up.” Stan’s smile, if a little bashful, was sincere. “Thanks.” 

“Don't thank me yet. See how you feel after we’ve been through fencing class.”

“Naw, Khrys, seriously. I… class used to be next best thing to a dirty word for me. Never thought I’d take one that didn't leave me feelin’ dumber at the end, worried what my Pa would say since Ford could do this crap in his sleep.” Stan ran his right hand across the back of his head. “It's really strange. School was a pain. In more ways than one. But this. It was like learning how my car works. It made sense. ”

“I'm pleased to hear it,” Khrys said, though her eyes didn't warm with her smile. After a moment, the warmth came back. “You're a sharp man, Stanley. I can't see how people overlooked it when you were a kid. No. Wait. I can. I keep forgetting how time flows for humans. It's been decades. You've collectively learned a lot in that time. You ever feel like learning something we don't have here, I can find someone to teach you.”

Stan gave her astonished brown eyes. “You'd do this for me?” his voice dropped to a whisper.

“You're a young man again. You've got a second chance to do things different. Best make the most of it, right?”

Stan leaned across the table on one elbow. “I got you to thank for that too?” 

Khrys gave her head a shake, popping a tomato into her mouth. Stan found himself staring distractedly at her lips until she swallowed. “Not me. Again, that's a lot of magic to spend on someone I didn't even know yet. Fix’s magic is too specific. But that doesn't mean I'm gonna let you go slacking off, now that we're friends.”

“That what we are now? You didn't just bring me here so my brother can pitch woo with the other kid in private?”

“So suspicious,” said Khrys with mock offense. The truth was, she had ideas about what Stanley wasn't saying. There was pain in the silent breaths and spaces between the words he was letting her coax out of him. So she understood the trust issues. “No, I genuinely think you're cool people. So yeah. We’re friends. With benefits as they say.”

Stan smiled; equal parts brilliant with happy surprise, and easy with relief. “Works for me. Especially the benefits.” Despite how kind and easy to get along with she was now, Stan suspected he was something of a downgrade from her usual company. He more than suspected he couldn't keep up with the circles she usually ran in. Best of all, drastically improved body or not, he knew he wasn't ready for anything serious, despite also having been mostly celibate for 30 some years. Especially not with a woman he more than suspected of being a literal faerie princess. 

“Okay enough with the touchy feely talking. You show me how to swordfight. I'll teach you how to box.” 

“You're on.” Khrys reached a hand out. Stan thought about it for a minute, then shook her hand once.

Khrys slowly raised an eyebrow, pinning Stanley under her gaze. 

“Awright. Sorry. Just things went kinda bad for me the last time I shook hands with someone non human.” 

Khrys kept her brows lifted. 

“Yeah, I know after last night… It's just bad associations, nothing you did.” 

The stony silence from Khrys continued. Stan sighed, and tried again. “Look, the last time I shook hands with a non human it was with a creature from the Nightmare Realm. He wanted to turn this universe into a realm of chaos. I shook hands with him, let him into my mind, and let Ford erase my mind to destroy him. So… handshakes with people who ain't human? They stress me out a little. Sue me.”

“No, Stanley, I'm sorry. Great Titania’s breastplate. I had no idea it happened with the nightmare realm! Forgive me. Your caution is warranted. Entirely. I didn't consider what sort of non-humans besides us also seal deals with a handshake. That’s justified careful. We can work something else out to make you comfortable.”

Stan looked pleasantly surprised. “I keep forgettin’. You and Daj are pretty close to human, but weird enough to understand these stories. Once more then. We’re cool. Let's go swing some swords.”

Stan took to fencing even more naturally than he did horseback riding. His form was not great to start, but the instructor who corrected it only had to do so once. He picked up each little change and added it to the running tally in his head. His long legs and the muscular length of his arms gave him not only great reach but amazing footwork. He could lunge and come back almost in the same second.

“I wouldn't say you're the first prodigy who caught on quick,” gusted the teacher at the end of the hour lesson. “But you're definitely the most enthusiastic.” 

Stan was practically dancing. The guns he kept locked up, but fencing was almost like, well, dancing. “This I like! Plus? I'm good at it! I never ran into this before. I learned to get good at things because I needed to. But this? Fun, and a useful skill too? It's like magic.”

“No magic in use, promise. This is all you. If you're enjoying yourself, we can come back and do these classes again. Or you can fish, or see what else you like.”

Stan circled his right shoulder, wincing pleasantly at the ache from honest exercise. “For the moment, I'm good with a shower, that massage, an’ then dinner. Lemme think about the other stuff, huh?”

“Of course. I've got a yoga class to teach. I'll see you for dinner? Seven?” 

“Seeya then, kid.” Khrys nodded and pranced out of the practice room, leaving Stanley to his own thoughts. 

He mused as he made his way back to the inn, thoughts going in circles like Stan expected it must be for Ford. He took a shower, then called to schedule a one hour massage and let his mind go entirely blank except for appreciating the sensation of having the knots rubbed out of his muscles. After the hour, he felt more clear headed. As he showered one more time (it felt weird to go to dinner covered in oil) he reflected on the words he had only just shared with Ford. “I'm not the dumb twin. I can learn things. Just not… with books and notes.” It was like feeling a missing puzzle piece finally fall into place. “Or can I?” Seized with a sudden idea, Stan quickly dried off and dressed, then took the elevator down to ground level. He asked around at the concierge if there was a library or bookstore and was pleased to be given directions to the bookstore.

Stanley had not been a strong reader in high school, partly because he simply preferred to crib off his brother’s work since it all came easily to Ford. Over the years, out of necessity, he had slowly, painfully strengthened the skill. The same was true of his math skills. A little searching found him a book on blade fighting. He charged the purchase to his room at the inn, and returned to the restaurant to read and wait for Khrys. He was so lost in the book that he only noticed she arrived when the wench who brought them fresh bread nudged the table with her hip. 

“Good read?” an amused Khrys asked over the tiger shrimp cocktail as Stan lowered the book. 

“Heh, yeah, better than most.”. Khrys gestured he should help himself to the shrimp. “I keep you waitin’ long?” 

“Only a few minutes. But by the look on your face, I didn't think it wise to interrupt.” 

“Just had a whaddayacallit… Kinda an awakening. I didn't hate readin’. I hated the subjects they made us read!” Stanley's smile was practically beatific. “The principal. My old man. They just didn't know what to do with a kid like me, and they didn't try. Ford didn't either, but he is now. And so are you.”

Khrys shrugged. “Hey, you figured that out on your own. Guess all those binges of Ducktective paid off.” in response to Stanley's surprised expression, she merely wiggled her fingers mysteriously. 

“You ain't foolin’ me, toots,” Stan smirked. “You play the part of the distant an’ mysterious princess but I've seen the other sides now.”

Khrys was about to respond when an unearthly noise shredded through the evening chatter. It sounded like the scream of a fox combined with the howl of a huge wolf that ended in a viscous gurgling. The room went dead silent.


	4. War Dogs, New Tricks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Khrys recognizes the ominous sound and goes alone to handle it. Stan, no slouch in a fight, joins her. They handle the outcome together and cement their friendship.

Khrys immediately got to her feet, eyes darting back and forth. The dinner crowd was full of leisurely young families. Human families, mostly, but a few fae families as well. The fae families looked more alarmed. Bad sign. “Sitting ducks,” she muttered under her breath. 

Stanley narrowed his eyes too. He could pick out which of the crowd were rubes, expecting a show with their meal. The staff didn't look prepared. Some of the families looked freaked. He concluded that the threatening sound was indeed a threat. Stan got to his feet and tucked his hands into his pockets nonchalantly. The howling scream gurgle sounded again. “Khrys.”

She was already halfway to the front door, having grabbed a spit for meat as she slid down the buffet table, ruining her dress. Stan shook his head in wry amusement and leapt to follow, palming a pair of carving knives.

Khrys didn't pause. She kicked out of her heels and called over shoulder. “Lock the doors behind us until we get back. Don’t open them until we say.”

The head waiter and serving wench were glad to oblige. Outside, the other doors on the main walk were slamming closed as well, but lights from high on the rooftops were blazing down on what made the unholy noise. The creatures shied away, sticking to the shadows, but still skulking toward the smells of food, bellies low to the ground. Even with them staying in the dark, Stan could tell they were hulking brutes. 

“... The hell are they?” Stan asked in a sideways stage whisper.

“Barghests,” was her answer. “Nasty fey hounds. They bite. Hard. And don't let go. Sometimes venomous.”

Stan gave Khrys a smile that was really more a baring of the teeth. “And it's just us? Against them?”. 

“You see anyone else? We don't keep wild things this dangerous near the town for obvious reasons. These guys are bold to come through the curtain. Or somebody's been slacking on the wards. We get through this, you have my apologies and my gratitude. Because after this you'll be a hero twice over. ”

“We’ll get through this, punkin,” Stanley said. “I've fought my share of junkyard dogs before. These are just bigger. We trap ‘em or kill   
’em?”

“Kill. They'll lead others here if we let them escape. We don't have enough big guns on campus now to fight off these guys. We’re done for if we get a whole pack. Two of us won't be enough.’

“Lady says dead dogs, boys.” Stan hefted the two knives in his hands. While they stood sorting out the plan, the barghests were starting to overcome their wariness and venture into the light. Stan could see their red eyes and rows of jagged teeth crowded into oversized jaws that dripped with greenish black ichor. Their coarse fur was dark, shimmering in the colors of the night. “These aren't balanced for throwing, but let's see what we can do.” 

Khrys gaped as Stan took the blades by their ends and held them. The nearest barghest was still 25 feet away, give or take. She saw the tension in Stan’s shoulders go taut and release as he flung the carving knives together. They flew evenly despite being combat repurposed. There was another unholy wail as the two knives found targets. The bravest of the monster dogs took a knife to its left eye and to its neck, severing a tendon. Its maw hung open, uncontrolled. The pair of barghests behind the first one yipped and heaved in distress as the largest attempted to rise. They set up a rumbling growl that would drown out the sound of a tractor.

Stan wasn't letting moss grow under his feet. There were wooden chairs and umbrellas all over the courtyard. Stan set to tearing the cloth off so they'd have makeshift spears. Khrys took the wooden spit and leaped into the air, putting her weight behind it as she drove the sharp pole into the chest of the barghest Stan wounded. It caterwauled something awful and thrashed. Khrys hung on grimly as the beast thrashed itself to death, impaled. 

That left two, and Stan put his back to Khrys’ as the beasts tried, slavering, to outflank them. “They're smarter than dogs,” observed Stan conversationally.

“Little bit,” Khrys agreed. “They're bigger and nastier --” whatever Khrys planned to say ended in a hiss of pain. She'd expected a claw swipe, and had jumped aside, but not quickly enough. Three bloody gashes opened in Khrys’ right calf. And the barghests turned their noses to the scent of blood in the air. “Damn it, I was too slow.”

“Those look deep. Stay on top of the table,” Stan said quietly, eyes worried. “I got this.” 

“By yourself?! Are you bonkers?!” 

“Not yet. But if I can handle a pterodactyl, this shouldn't be too much tougher. And I was in my sixties then.” 

“Then it's time for some backup.” Face twisted in concentration and pain, Khrys mouthed words and moved her hands in complicated gestures. The makeshift spears sprouted new green shoots as Stanley charged forward with them. Huge, matted paws became entangled in the sudden growth. The barghest thrashed but the vines grew tighter. Stan took the spit from the body of the first barghest and used it on the second, holding it at such an angle that when the beast jumped, it came down on the sharp stick. Roots sprang out of the ground and curled around their snouts and necks to make sure they remained down. 

One Barghest remained, and it was poised to pounce, having seen its pack mates die before its eyes. It swiped at Stan and missed as he danced back. He reached back for another makeshift umbrella spear only to find that the barghests had chomped them to splinters while he was seeing Khrys to safety. “... Shit.” 

Stan pulled out one of the wood chairs and smashed it against the ground. The front two legs broke off sharply and Stan waited for the circling beast to come closer. He crouched, counter circling. The beast made a swat at the makeshift weapon, managing to open gashes in Stan’s chest. He swore under his breath and lunged,driving the chair legs into the Barghest’s neck above its shoulders. It shrieked In pain and bucked, trying to throw Stan off before tiring out and collapsing. There were no helpful roots or vines this time. That didn't bode well for Khrys. He staggered back, then death dropped the table on the last barghest, breaking its neck.

“Three monster dogs down,” panted Stan. There was no more howling to indicate the fight needed a round two. “How you doing, Princess?” 

“Been better,” Khrys quavered, her face ashen and bloodless. She tipped over into the puddle of blood from her injury. 

Stan grimaces. “Okay, Princess, let's get you all patched up.” He picked Khrys up and cuddled her to his chest, despite his own bleeding wounds. He kicked in the door to the ground floor and carried Khrys to the elevator. “Send up a doctor to the A suite on the 10th floor,” he said to no one in particular, and elbowed the door close button.

Between the fatigue and the blood loss, Stan himself was seeing fuzzily by the time the elevator opened on their suite. He placed Khrys gently on the bed, then staggered to the bathroom for painkiller. The cold water helped him focus long enough to pop a couple painkillers he recognized; the medicine chest was well appointed with a bunch of remedies he didn't recognize. So he cleaned her leg as best he could, with soap, elevated the leg, and put her in one of the clean shirts from the valet.


	5. A Hero's Reward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enforced downtime for Khrys and Stan -- they come to an understanding and an agreement. So does the whole town.

It wasn't a long wait for help to arrive. These barghests had been young and weak, but their venom sacs had been active. Stan was starting to see double when the elevator opened and a 3 foot tall lookalike for Betty White stalked out. Except she had that same gravity defying thing going on with her hair. “Healer. You can call me Betty, everyone does. You've been poisoned, son, and by the amount of blood lost, she'll need a heal but a poison clarifier too. Start by chewing this.”. She handed Stan a dark green wad of gum. “Shut up and chew.” 

Stan didn't argue. He counted himself lucky it tasted like parsley and mint. Within moments his vision cleared. The pain persisted. 

Whatever Betty had going on hurt Stan’s eyes to watch. He looked away and kept his mouth shut as ordered. It was a tense few hours as she worked, occasionally murmuring to herself in a language he never heard. Khrys’ long dark lashes stayed closed. Her horns flickered and vanished. As her body fought to conserve magic, she dropped back into what Stan considered the default: slightly more gorgeous than usual human with pointed ears.

“C’mon Princess…” 

Four hours into the night, Betty was done. She applied a bright green mucilage to Both their claw wounds. “Relax, slick. You'll play the piano again. And you won't have a limp. Both of you are gonna need calories, so order room service. Make her eat every two hours. Goes for you too. I'm sending up steaks for you and spinach juice for the chippie in the morning. Gotta replace the blood lost. Stay in bed.”

“You got it Doc.” Stan gave the tiny woman no backsass. He had watched her bring Khrys Back from the verge of death. And brought him back from only a little farther out. “You're a lifesaver.” 

“Oh, a comedian,” was Betty's smirked response. “No seriously. You saved the resort. Expect a lot visitors and your ass kissed. The leatherworker is already skinning them, and you get pick of them.” 

“Yeah? Great. It’ll be the first believable monster I put in the Shack!” Stan grinned, then leaned back in the bed beside Khrys. The dizziness and double vision came back. “Whoa. Those things really pack a punch!” 

“Yeah they do so you don't get to jump outta bed the minute you get to feeling better. You won't be. And a relapse is almost bad as starting from square one.” 

Stan followed the instructions given without complaint for once. His medical history was littered with broken bones, lost teeth, and unpaid bills. The tiny medical person had used some kind of folk remedies combined with magic and she hadn’t said a word about a bill because he’d been a hero. Again. “I could get used to this.”

“Mmph. At this rate...you’ll never spend… so much as a ...penny here,” came Khrys’ weak voice. 

“Welcome back, Princess.” Stan didn’t bother hiding his relief. He bent and kissed her forehead. “Good to see ya. How ya feelin’?”

“I feel like I’ve been under an ogre’s butt for a week,” Khrys moaned, frowning down at her bandaged leg. “But at least I’ll live. How about you?”

“Never done the ogre butt thing, and I aim to keep it that way, kid. But otherwise, yeah, about the same. Those claws cut deeper than I thought.” 

“And hungry,” They concluded at the same time. 

“Betty White said we’ll need to eat every 2 hours to replace the lost blood,” Stan explained. “So I guess no fencing lessons for a few days?”

“More like weeks. You got a chest wound, and I’m sure I’m not good to walk for a while. Sorry it killed your proper vacay.” 

“Kid, I just killed a mythological monster. I’m gonna get its carcass to take back to the Shack. And while we’re laid up, I’m gonna get to read about horseback riding, fencing, and this other stuff I never knew I’d enjoy learning about. It’s still the best vacation I’ve ever had.”

Khrys smiled and for the first time, Stan thought he was getting a look at her real face. The horns had come back, but her guard was down. She looked a lot more like Dajan when she relaxed and avoided putting on airs. Stanley simply kept that thought to himself, and savored the trust.

The month went quickly despite Betty returning to growl at them, check their progress, feed them more green parsley mint gruel, and make sure they were not having a reaction to the Barghest poison. She also gave them regimens for physical therapy so their injuries would not result in limps or problems with the arms. They exercised together, as Betty allowed.

Khrys put off her “eats like a bird” facade and ate the way their doctor ordered. She started with the spinach smoothies, then was soon keeping up with Stan bite for bite on healing red meat. 

Khrys also sent a runner to the bookstore for more books for Stan; he was turning out to be voracious now that he had subjects that interested him. She found a few fencing and swordfighting videos for him as well. 

A few weeks later, the scars were not even visible anymore. Stan’s chest hair had grown back twice as thick. “I’m comin’ back here the next time I throw my back out...wait, that’s not gonna happen for 30 more years!” Stan’s laughter echoed across the suite. 

“People are not gonna recognize you when you come back.”

“Let’em wonder, Princess. Learning to appreciate life again is worth any number of cockeyed looks.” 

“You’re right. You’ve reminded me to enjoy life a little more myself. So...good on ya for that.” 

“Whaddaya mean?”

“I DJ because I enjoy doing it. I throw parkour in because it keeps me above the crowd, keeps me in shape, and makes things interesting. No other club in Manhattan has turntables and mp4 players hanging from the ceiling for their DJ to hit over the course of the night. But honestly -- it’s that I don’t really ...connect with people. My cousin kept trying. Over and over, getting her heart broken when people decided whatever was weird about her was too weird. I watched her and decided I wasn’t made to put up with it like she does. So I cultivated the spooky, sexy unattainable princess thing so people could guess and assume whatever they like about me. Even if none of it is true.” 

“Hey, you quit it with that downtrodden poor me pity party, kid, ya hear me?” Stan waggled a finger at her. “I know outta my league when I see it, but any guy who’d think you were too weird to get with is both a putz and a schmendrick. Havin’ been lucky enough to be yer vacation screw, I know whereof I speak. And the guy who breaks yer heart is gonna answer to Stan and his brass coated sidemen--got it?”

Khrys just smiled. No one had ever offered violence in defense of her heart before. After a moment, she nodded to confirm to an expectant Stan she got the picture. 

“So tell ya what. I’ll come to yer club and you can come down off your park-oor or whatever. Or we’ll hang out here in P-vale. It’ll be good to have a place we don’t have to wear masks, huh?” 

Khrys blinked, surprised. “You’re on.”

“And don’t think nothing of that I just wanna be buds is all. It’s a rare thing to have a good friend. My last couple shots at romance ended… Badly. Rather not screw it up with you so things don't get… Awkward. Ford was my only friend for most of my life. And now I got more life in front of me than I was countin’ on. ” 

Within another week, they were back on their feet again, and greeted with applause by the families who hadn’t cycled out. The fencing teacher presented him with a sword cane, attached to the 8-ball walking stick. It glowed faintly shimmery gold even in the daylight. “They tell me treasure is your thing, young man,” the instructor said. “Feed your blade a little blood in a fight and it will find treasure for you. This is fae-forged steel, with the enchantment folded into the blade. incomparable to anything you’d find from a human swordsmith.” 

Stan looked down at the blade that felt so light in his hand that it barely changed the weight of the cane. He looked back up at the instructor. “It’s too much.”

“It is no such thing!” she cut him off, using the blade to make his attention, six inches from his significant nose. “Every life in this town is owed to you, every man woman and child, human or fae. Those beasts would have ravaged and dug and clawed until their bellies were full or we all were dead. This does not come close to touching the debt we owe you. So do not insult us and tell us it is too much!” 

Stan’s face reddened. He had not thought of it that way and ducked his head to acknowledge he understood now what she meant. “I will carry it with pride and draw it in pride,” he said, humbled. 

The rest of the month went like this. The barghest skin had been turned into an oiled leather coat of many pockets, enchanted to hold not only his sword, but anything else he cared to carry with him. The lining was woven sap soaked pine needles, making the coat not only waterproof but all-weather but keeping it light. There was even a tiny flask of barghest poison if he ever found himself in against an opponent who fought dirty. The carcass of the last Barghest had been rendered in taxidermy, mid leap, with the two wooden staves Stan used to kill it still sticking out of its back.

Last of all -- at the end of the street, a new cottage. It looked like a one-man-size replica of the Mystery Shack but without all the touristy acoutrements. It was just a cottage with stained glass windows, not one of which looked as it did back in Oregon. 

“How… How’d… I dunno what to say,” Stan said, around a sudden lump in his throat. 

“Don’t say anything,” Khrys grinned. “What’s done is done. We’re magic but we’re not royalty. We can’t knight you but we can appreciate the ever lovin’ hell outta you. Let’s go start your latest fencing lesson in the yard, then go break in the rest of the house.”

“I love the way you think, Princess,” Stan roared with laughter, and took off at a run toward his new little cottage, Khrys in close pursuit. Ford was no longer the only twin who had multiversal adventures under his belt anymore.


End file.
